Quails, ortolans, teal, pies of truffles and veal,
How they gobble and gash the fat calipash,
That slips down the throttle, like a melted green-
bottle;

Fish, flesh, fowl, and jellies, thus cramm'd in their bellies,

How many a stomach, disturb'd with a rum ach, Will have cause to remember the ninth of November!

Hark! bark! to the popping of corks, and the slopping

Of sparkling champagne, as it froths up amain, While tradesmen from Wapping, their dia

phragms sopping,

With censure will follow each bumper they swallow.

Mr. Deputy Jarvis, here's to ye, my sarvice! How like you this Rhenish?-Betwixt and betweenish

Is it Hock or Moselle? who the devil can tell?
What, call this Madeira! Tis all a chimera.
It's Cape, or else made in the Op'ra Colonnade.
And yet I prefar it to vinegar Claret.
There's nothing, I think, for a Gemman to
drink.-

Please to charge all your glasses-a bumper

"The lasses !"_

Ask the most miserably ignorant slattern of all London if she can cook a steak; she tells you, "Yes," contemns your admonitions, and brings you up at last a strip of flesh, on one side black, and bloody on the other, that seems as it were torn from the unhappy flanks of a roasting victim of the Ashantees; nay, in how many instances throughout all London does one meet with what is truly, verily, and worthily a good rump steak? Not ten. How many requisite considerations should precede the hope of such a piece of simple excellence ? The age, the country, and the pasture of your beef; an accurate certificate of its slaughter; the peculiar cut of the rump, (at least the fifth from the commencement ;) the nature of your fire; the construction and elevation of your gridiron; the choice of your shalot; the masterly precision of your oyster-sauce, (if such a thing you use,) in which the essence of the simmered, but completely penetrated, fish is thoroughly transfused throughout the wellproportioned liquid that involves it. Let no unholy hand profane with pepperand better were it too if salt were also interdicted from your broiling steak. It is to be a work of doric plainness and propriety; the gourmand of experience has at command "appliances and means to boot," that might make it "dinner for a king!" Quot homines, tot sententiæ. Where is your Quin, your Hervey, Bur

gess, and Mogol? Where your walnutKetchup? Lambert's only is legitimate. What! dost thou not warm each, before committed to the pure, hot, effluent gravy of your steak? which, once congealed, assails the palate with a fatal apathy, and nullifies the palatic susceptibility. Let the ambitious cook attempt to give perfection to his steak by the appurtenance of wafers, thin as the ranks of patriots, and crisp as courtiers' oaths. Although the inexperienced gourmand should recoil, when he is told the miracle of pleasure must be found in the necromantic application of downright assafoetida.

Here is indeed an article, which many cooks would fear to class among their list of esculents; but which, when governed by the genius of a chef, becomes a very mighty agent in the principle of savour. It is, in fact, the grand distinction of the Gastronome of modern times, to bring within the scope of human purposes, by the exertion of his skill, such viands as in the darkness of his art were utterly rejected by the gustation of unlearned purveyors. Blackwood's Mag.

The Selector;

AND

LITERARY NOTICES OF NEW WORKS.

MEMORABLE EVENTS OF 1814. THESE are now becoming matters of history, and we are glad to witness a liberal attempt lately made to throw them into a library volume, as the Journal of a Détenu, which has been given to the world under the editorship of Mr. Britton. Of course, many of the details of these "events" are fresh in our memories, although fourteen years of incidents have crowded on us since their occurrence. By such as have "gone over the ground," (we speak topographically,) they will be read with additional interest. Our present extract relates to Napoleon's Pillar in Place Vendôme at Paris, an engraving of which appeared in No. 297 of the MIRROR. It alludes to the removal of the statue of Napoleon, which formerly decorated the acroterion of the column:

Arriving at the Rue Castiglione, I saw a man mounted on the acroterion of the column, in the Place Vendôme, attempting, with a large hammer, to break the colossal statue of Bonaparte off at the ancles. The little Victory which it held in the left hand had already been thrown down, as this work was begun about three o'clock. A ladder, placed in the gallery above the capital, gave access to the statue, round the neck of which a rope was fast

ened, reaching to the ground. After the man had continued hammering for some time, the mob below made some ineffectual efforts to pull it down. Two men again attacked with hammers the ancles of the Statue: while they were thus employed, a fellow mounted on its shoulders, sat upon the head, amused himself with pulling the jackdaws' nests out of the crown of laurel, and throwing them to the mob below; then getting forward, committed an insult of the most offensive and indecorous nature upon the face of the august Napoleon ;* and remounting on the head, he waved a white handkerchief, and cried "Vive le roi !" These feats were encouraged by the shouts and clapping of the surrounding multitude. Another rope was brought and fixed to the statue; to the lower extremities of the ropes several others were fastened to facilitate the united efforts of the mob, who, after making several vain attempts to overthrow the statue, desisted at night-fall. 1 then approached the column; the keeper, who was within the iron railing which surrounds it, told me that (“ on dit") all this was doing by order of the emperor of Russia. A large pitcher of wine was on the steps, glasses of which a man was offering with great civility. A sansculotte, after drinking, said, "See what it is to be treated by gens comme il faut ; they provide glasses, while that canaille, who are now kicked out, suffered us. to drink as we could." The general belief was, that this attempt to pull down the statue of Napoleon was made by order of the allies; no one appeared to feel any indignation, and most certainly the greater number of those assembled were pleased. M. de Maubreuil was the person who excited the mob to the deed, although M. Sosthenes de Rochefoucault arrogated to himself the merit of it: he did, however, distribute money as well as M. de Maubreuil.

DUTCH COMFORTS.

(From a "Musical Ramble.") It was on a very warm and wet Sunday that I had the first taste of the delights of Dutch scenery and a Dutch atmosphere, driving along a road as smooth as ◆ Among the pieces of captured brass, above thirty culverins, of the finest cinque-cente work, that were preserved in the arsenal at Vienna,

were melted to enter into the composition of this monument. M. Gerard, one of the twenty-six sculptors employed in making the clay models for the bas-reliefs which cover it, assured me that every one of these ancient culverins was better worth preserving as a work of art than the whole of the column. They were adorned with battles, trophies, and rich armorial bearings of the finest chiseling, and yet Denon, who, as sole director of the execution of the column, might have saved them, or prevented their being melted, passes for a man of taste!

There

In

a carpetted drawing-room, occasionally embellished with straight rows of stunted poplars, and bounded by a canal on one side, and a ditch on the other. was no getting out of sight of water. the vicinity of Amsterdam, the ostentatious country residences of the city merchants thrust themselves upon the notice; and, as though the cockney idea of rurality had sailed here, in the lodge, at the entrance of his grounds, sat the wealthy burgher, with his powdered head and red face, spending his Sunday afternoon in smoking, revolving his affairs, and looking at the stage-coaches, while his wife and daughters, in the same room, were melancholy over their tea; to complete the fascination and salubrity of this apartment, & stagnant pool, with an appropri"ate" green mantle," lay under the windows. Money in Holland cannot procure absolute comfort, but only a mitigation of wretchedness; it is a place in which, as some satirist has said, one goes 66 on board." The cigars, chafing-dishes, and dram-bottles, with which the inhabitants, who are ever foining with the ague, parry its thrusts, are to a stranger more intolerable than the damp air against which they are thought antidotes.

The Dutch may be equally wise and flower-loving, but they are neither handsome nor agreeable; their conversation is as lumbering as their language and formation. There is no German opera at present in Amsterdam, the death of the principal singers having put a stop to it. At the Dutch theatre the audience is not select; whistling, hallooing, and fighting, absolutely unknown in German playhouses, flourish there.

JOHN BULL.

FROM Bruges to Ghent, a distance of thirty miles, you are transported by a second and more splendid barge, which will be found an agreeable mode of conveyance: the table d'hote might satisfy any city alderman, or even gourmet from the o'clock, it would only be considered as a West end; but, being served at one déjeuné à la fourchette. An anecdote is told of a certain John Bull, who was so delighted with the good cheer and the agreeable company he met with in this finely gilded barge (a present from Bonaparte to the city of Ghent), that, instead of proceeding on his travels, he agreed with the skipper to remain on board until his funds were expended, returning to Tooley-street, his head crammed with broken French, and his stomach with Schiedam, an all-accomplished traveller!--A Companion for the Visitor to Brussels.

TYROLESE CARRIER. IN the Tyrol, the lighter sort of merchandise is transported in a singular equipage, a light two-wheeled cart, to which are yoked (tandem-fashion) a small mule, a man, and a woman; the mule, equipped with bells, is placed in the shafts; the male biped is in the middle, and the fair one leads. One evening, says a recent tourist, we overtook one of these machines, and halted to examine so novel an equipage. We found the proprietor an intelligent fellow. Having of fered him schnapps and a pipe, which put him into great good humour, he told us he had, for thirty-five years, been a carrier between his native village and two neighbouring ones; that he made two voyages a week, and during the above period had lost not a single day by sickness, although his cattle were sometimes knocked up. "My journey," continued our swaager between his whiffs, "is rather more than two miles (eleven English) besides occasional callings on my customers out of my line, so that I am five hours at work. I have had three wives. My first proved too delicate for harness, and lived but a few years. She left me, however, two kleinchens (children). My son is a soldier, and my daughter keeps my house. My second spouse, a strong-boned frau, had some gelt, and made a contract that she was not to be treated like a mule. She sat at home and took to schnapps. One day she dropped down dead, while I was on my journey. My last wife, being a tailor, made more money by her trade than by assisting me, so that I have never been able to get cart-work out of any of my wives, and am obliged to hire a labourer. The wench you see has been with me three years, and is both strong and willing. But I am getting old and stiff in my joints, and hope my son will get his discharge, and take to my trade. I have scraped together a little money, and wish to retire." This sort of harangue, interrupted occasionally by schnapps and fill. ing his pipe, lasted an hour, and caused my friend much amusement, in which, from my ignorance of German, I could not participate. The fellow was a humorist, and, from the colour of his nose, a bon vivant. During his labours of thirty-five years, at the rate of fifty miles a week, he had dragged this cart eighty thousand miles!-He had passed his grand climacteric, and yet, in spite of pretty frequent attacks on the brandy bottle, to which he confessed he was addicted, he was as vigorous and as fresh as a man of five and forty. Musical Ramble.

66 MARCH OF MIND." THE following is a genuine morceau of "the young idea" :

Farther I ham Very Bad of For chose I only ask one question That Is If you Wil give me one Shilling I can git a Pair as good as new I man Sir your o Begent William V. unble Sirvant

Really, it is high time for the schoolmaster to be abroad.

We must not forget the "children of a larger growth," who have lately superscribed the doors of an Exhibition, “Entrance" and "Egress : Sooner than such pedantry had appeared, application should have been made to the Board of Green Cloth, or the Court Newsman.

I MET with the following epitaph in the church-yard of South Petherwin, in Cornwall, and upon inquiry found it was written by an ancestor of one of the present representatives of that county.

Z. Y. Beneath this stone lies Humphry and Joan, Who, together rest in peace,

Living indeed They disagreed, But now all quarrels cease.

THE Gulf of Negropont, in Greece, ebbs and flows seven times a day. Aristotle not being able to give any rational acself therein, saying, “If I cannot uncount of this phenomenon, drowned himderstand thee, thou shalt take me."

G. H. C.