which is daughter to master George Page, which is pretty virginity. Slen. Mistress Anne Page? She has brown hair, and speaks small like a woman. Eva. It is that fery verson for all the 'orld, as just as you will desire; and seven hundred pounds of monies, and gold, and silver, is ber grandsire, upon his death's-bed, (Got deliver to a joyful resurrections :) give, when she is able to overtake seventeen years old: it were a goot motion, if we leave our pribbles and prabbles, and desire a marriage between master Abraham, and mistress Anne Page. Shal. Did her grandsire leave her seven hundred pound? Eva. Ay, and her father is make her a petter penny : Shal. I know the young gentlewoman; she has good gifts. Eva. Seven hundred pounds, and possibilities, is good gifts. Shal. Well, let us see honest master Page: Is Falstaff there? Eva. Shall I tell you a lie? I do despise a liar, as I do despise one that is false; or, as I despise one that is not true. The knight, Sir John, is there; and, I beseech you, be ruled by your well-willers. I will peat the door [knocks] for master Page. What, hoa! Got pless your house here! Enter PAGE. Page. Who's there? Eva. Here is Got's plessing, and your friend, and justice Shallow and here young master Slender; that peradventures shall tell you another tale, if matters grow to your likings. Page. I am glad to see your worship's well: I thank you for my venison, master Shallow. Shal. Master Page, I am glad to see you: Much good do it your good heart! I wished your venison better: it was ill kill'd :-How doth good mistress Page ?-and I love you always with my heart, la; with my heart. Page. Sir, I thank you. Shal. Sir, I thank you; by yea and no, I do. Page. I am glad to see you, good master Slender. Shal. Sir, he's a good dog, and a fair dog; Can there be more said? ie is good and fair.Is Sir John Falstaff here ? Page. Sir, he is within; and I would I could do a good office between you. Eva. It is spoke as a Christians ought to speak. Shal. He bath wrong'd me, master Page. Page. Sir, he doth in some sort confess it. Shal. If it be confess'd, it is not redress'd; is not that so, master Page? He hath wrong'd me; indeed, he hath ;-at a word, he hath ;believe me ;-Robert Shallow, esquire, saith he is wrong'd. Page. Here comes Sir John. Enter Sir JOHN FALSTAFF, BARDOLPH, NYM, and PISTOL. Fal. Now, master Shallow; you'll complain me to the king? Shal. Knight, you have beaten my men, killed my deer, and broke open my lodge. Fal. But not kiss'd your keeper's daughter? Shal. Tut, a pin! this shall be answer'd. Fal. I will answer it straight;-I have done all this :-That is now auswer'd. Shal, The council shall know this. • Soft. + Cotswold in Gloucestershire Fal. 'Twcre better for you, if it were known in counsel you'll be laugh'd at. Eva. Pauca verba, Sir John, good worts. Fal. Good worts! good cabbage.-Slender, I broke your head; What matter have you against me? Slen. Marry, Sir, I have matter in my head against you; and against your coney-catching + rascals, Bardolph, Nym, and Pistol. They carried me to the tavern, and made me drunk, and afterwards picked my pocket. Burd. You Banbury cheese! ‡ Pist. How now, Mephostophilus ? Nym. Slice, I say! pauca, pauca ; ¦ slice [ that's my humour. Slen. Where's Simple, my man?-can you tell, cousin ? Eva. Peace: I pray you! Now let us under. stand: There is three umpires in this matter as I understand that is-master Page, fidelicet, master Page; and there is myself, fidelicet, myself; and the three party is, lastly and finally, mine host of the Garter. Page. We three, to hear it, and end it between them. Eva. Fery goot: I will make a prief of it in my note-book; and we will afterwards 'ork upon the cause, with as great discreetly as we can. Fal. Pistol,-— Pist. He bears with ears. Eva. The tevil and his tam! what phrase is this, He hears with ears? Why, it is affectations. Fal. Pistol, did you pick master Slender's purse? Slen. Ay, by these gloves, did he, (or I would I might never come in mine own great chamber again else,) of seven groats in mill-sixpences, and two Edward shovel-boards, ¶ that cost me two shillings and twopence a-piece of Yead Miller, by these gloves. Fal. Is this true, Pistol? Eva. No; it is false, if it is a pick-purse. I combat challenge of this latten bilbo : Nym. Be advised, Sir, and pass good hu mours: I will say, marry trap, with you, if you run the nutbook's ‡‡ humours on me; that is the very note of it. Slen. By this hat, then he in the red face had it for though I cannot remember what I did when you made me drunk, yet I am not aitogeher an ass. Fal. What say you, Scarlet and John? Bard. Why, Sir, for my part, I say, the gentleman had drunk bimself out of his five sentences. Eva. It is his five senses: fie, what the ignorance is! Bard. And being fap, $5 Sir, was, as they say, cashier'd; and so conclusions pass'd the careires. Slen. Ay, you spake in Latin then too; but 'tis no matter: I'll ne'er be drunk whilst I live again, but in honest, civil, godly company, for this trick: if I be drunk, I'll be drunk with those that have the fear of God, and not with drunken knaves. Eva. So Got 'udge me, that is a virtaous mind. of his hands, as any is between this and his head; he hath fought with a warrener. ⚫ Quick. How say you?-Oh! I should remem ber him? Does he not hold up his head, as it were? and strut in his gait ? Sim. Yes, indeed, does he. Quick. Well, heaven send Anne Page no worse fortune Tell master parson Evans, I will do what can for your master: Anne is a good girl, and I wish Re-enter RUGBY. brew, bake, scour, dress meat and drink, make the beds, and do all myself ; Sim. 'Tis a great charge, to come under one body's hand. Quick. Are you advis'd o' that? you shall find it a great charge and to be up early, and down late ;-but notwithstanding, (to tell you in your ear; I would have no words of t;) my master bimself is in love with mistress Anne Page: but notwithstanding that,-I know Anne's mind,— that's neither here nor there. Caius. You jack'nape; give-a dis letter to Sir Hugh; by gar, it is a shallenge: 1 vill cut Rug. Out, alas! here comes my master. his throat in de park; and I vill teach a scurvy Quick. We shall all be shent + Run in here, jack-a-nape priest to meddle or make-you good young man; go into this closet. [Shuts may be gone; it is not good you tarry here:SIMPLE in the closet.] He will not stay long.-by gar, I will cut all his two stones; by gar, he What, John Rugby! John, what, John, I say! shall not have a stone to trow at his dog. -Go, John, go inquire for my master; I doubt he be not well, that he comes not home :-and down, down, adown-a, &c. [Sings. Enter Doctor CAIUS. Caius. Vat is you sing? I do not like dese toys; Pray you, go and vetch me in my closet un boitier verd: a box, a green-a box; Do intend vat I speak ? a green-a box. Quick. Ay, forsooth, I'll fetch it you. I am glad he went not in himself; if he had found the young man, he would have been horn-mad. [Aside. Caius. Fe, fe, fe, fe ma foi, il fait fort chaud. Je m'en vais a la Cour,-la grand affaire. Quick. Is it this, Sir? Caius. Ouy; mette le au mon pocket; Depeche, quickly :-Vere is dat knave, Rugby ? Quick. What, John Rugby ! John ? Rug. Here, Sir. Caius. You are John Rugby, and you are Jack Rugby: Come, take-a your rapier, and come after my heel to de court. Rug. "Tis ready, Sir, here in the porch. Caius. By my trot, I tarry too long:-Od's me! Qu'a y j'oublie ? dere is some simples in my closet, dat I vill not for the varld I shall leave behind. Quick. Ah! me! he'll find the young mau there, and be mad. Caius. O diable! diable! vat is in my closet-Villany? larron! [Pulling SIMPLE out.] Rugby, my rapier. Quick. Good master, be content. Caius. Verefore shall I be content-a! Quick. The young man is an honest man. Caius. Vat shall de honest man do in my closet dere is no honest man dat shall come in my closet. Quick. I beseech you, be not so flegmatic; hear the truth of it: He came of an errand to me from parson Hugh. Caius. Vell. Sim. To desire this honest gentlewoman, your maid, to speak a good word to mistress Anne Page for my master, in the way of marriage. Quick. This is all, indeed, la; but I'll ne'er but my finger in the fire, and need not. Caius. Sir Hugh send-a you ?-Rugby, baillez me some paper :-Tarry you a little-a while. [Writes. Quick. I am glad he is so quiet: if he had been thoroughly moved, you should have heard him so loud, and so melancholy;-But notwithstanding, man, I'll do your master what good can: and the very yea and the no is, the French Doctor, my master,-I may call him my master, ook you for I keep his house; and I wash, wring, The keeper of a warren. ↑ Scolded, reprimanded. [Exit SIMPLE. Quick. Alas, he speaks but for his friend. Caius. It is no matter-a for dat :-do not you tell a me dat I shall have Anne Page for my self?-by gar, I vill kil de Jack priest; and i have appointed mine host of de Jarterre to measure out weapon :-by gar, I vill myself have Anne Page.. Quick. Sir, the maid loves you, and all shall be well we must give folks leave to prate : What the goujere ! Caius. Rugby, come to the court vit me ;By gar, if I have not Anne Page, I shall turn your bead out of my door :-Follow my heels, Rugby. [Exeunt CAIUS and RUGBY. Quick. You shall have An fools-head of your own. No, I know Anne's mind for that: neve a woman in Windsor knows more of Anne's mind than I do; nor can do more than I do with her, I thank heaven. Fent. [Within.] Who's within there, bo? Quick. Who's there, I trow? Come near the house, I pray you. Enter FENTON. Fent. How now, good woman; how dost thou? Quick. The better, that it pleases your good worship to ask. Fent. What news? how does pretty mistress Anne? Quick. In truth, Sir, and she is pretty, and honest, and gentle; and one that is your friend, I can tell you that by the way; I praise heaven for it. Fent. Shall I do any good, thinkest thou? Shall I not lose my suit? Quick. Troth, Sir, all is in his hands above: but notwithstanding, master Fenton, I'll be sworn on a book she loves you :-Have not your worship a wart about your eye? Fent. Yes, marry, have I; what of that? Quick. Well, thereby hangs a tail;-god faith, it is such another Nan:-but, I detest, ↑ an honest maid as ever broke bread :-We had an hour's talk of that wart:-I shall never laugh but in that maid's company ?-But, indeed she is given too much to allicholly and musing: But for you-Well, go to. Fent. Well, I shall see her to-day: Hold, there's money for thee; let me have thy voice in my behalf: if thou seest her before me, commend ine Quick. Will 1? i'faith, that we will: and I will tell your worship more of the wart, the next time we have confidence; and of other wooers. Fent. Well, farewell; I am in great haste Scene 1. THE MERRY WIVES OF WINDSOR. ACT II. . SCENE 1.-Before PAGE's House. Enter Mistress PAGE, with a letter. Mrs. Page. What! have I'scaped love-letters in the holy-day time of my beauty, and am I now a subject for them? Let me see: [Reads. Ask me no reason why I love you; for though love use reason for his precisian, he admits him not for his counsellor: You are not young, no more am I; go to then, there's sympathy: you are merry, so am I; Ha! ha! then there's more sympathy: you love sack, and so do I; Would you desire better sympathy? Let it suffice thee, mistress Page, (at the least if the love of a soldier can suffice,) that I love thee. I will not say, pity me, 'tis not a soldier-like phrase; but I say, love me. By me, Thine own true knight, John Falstaff. 891 comfort in this mystery of ill opinions, bere's the twin-brother of thy letter: but let thine inherit first; for, I protest, mine never shall. I warrant, he hath a thousand of these letters, more,) and these are of the second edition: He writ with blank space for different names, (sure will print them out of doubt: for he cares not what he puts into the press, when he would put lascivious turtles, ere one chaste man. us two. I had rather be a giantess, and lie under mount Pelion. Well, I will find you twenty very hand, the very words: What doth be think Mrs. Ford. Why, this is the very same; the of us? almost ready to wrangle with mine own honesty. 'll entertain myself like one that I am not acMrs. Page. Nay, I know not: It makes me quainted withal; for, sure, unless he know some strain in me that I know not myself, he would never have boarded me in this fury. Mrs. Ford. Boarding, call you it? sure to keep him above deck. I'll be Mrs. Page. So will I; if he come under my hatches, I'll never to sea again. Let's be revenged on him: let's appoint him a meeting; give him a show of comfort in his suit; and lead him on with a fine baited delay, till he hath pawn'd his horses to mine Host of the Garter. Mrs. Ford. Nay, I will consent to act any chariness of our honesty. Oh! that my husband saw this letter! it would give eternal food to his jealousy. What a Herod of Jewry is this? O wicked, wicked, world!-one that is well nigh worn to pieces with age, to show himself a young gallant! What an unweighed behaviour bath this Fle-villany against him, that may not sully the mish drunkard picked (with the devil's name) out of my conversation, that he dares in this manner assay me? Why, he hath not been thrice in my company !-What should I say to him?1 was then frugal of my mirth :-heaven forgive me!-Why, I'll exhibit a bill in the parliament for the putting down of men. revenged on him? for revenged I will be, as How shall I be sure as his guts are made of puddings. Enter Mistress FORD. Mrs. Ford. Mistress Page! trust me, I was going to your house. Mrs. Page. And, trust me, I was coming to you. You look very ill. Mrs. Ford. Nay, I'll ne'er believe that; I have to show to the contrary. Mrs. Page. 'Faith, but you do, in my mind. Mrs. Ford. Well, I do then; yet, I say, I could show you to the contrary: O mistress Page, give me some counsel ! Mrs. Page. What's the matter, woman? Mrs. Ford. O woman, if it were not for one trifling respect, I could come to such honour! Mrs. Page. Hang the trifle, woman; take the honour: What is it?--dispense with trifles ;what is it? my good man too: he's as far from jealousy, as Mrs. Page. Why, look, where he comes; and am from giving him cause; and that, I hope, is an unmeasurable distance. Mrs. Ford. You are the happier woman. Mrs. Puge. Let's consult together against this greasy knight: Come hither. [They retire. Enter FORD, PISTOL, PAGE, and NYM. Ford. Why, Sir, my wife is not young. Both young and old, one with another, Ford; Pist. With liver burning hot: Prevent, or go Like Sir Actæon he, with Ringwood at thy heels: Ford. What name, Sir? Take beed, ere summer comes, or cuckoo-birds Ford. I will be patient; I will find out this. Mrs. Ford. If I would but go to hell for an eternal moment, or so, I could be knighted. Mrs. Page. What?-thon liest!-Sir Alice Ford!--These knights will thou shouldst not alter the article of thy gentry. back; and so Mrs. Ford. We burn day-light-here, read, read;-perceive how I might be knighted.-İ shall think the worse of fat men, as long as I the humour of lying. He hath wronged me in Nym. And this is true. [To PAGE.] I like not have an eye to make difference of men's liking: some humours; I should have borne the huAnd yet he would not swear; praised women's moured letter to her but I have a sword, and modesty and gave such orderly and well-be- it shall bite upon my necessity. He loves your haved reproof to all uncomeliness, that I would wife; there's the short and the long. My name have sworn his disposition would have gone to is corporal Nym; I speak, and I avouch. Tis the truth of his words: but they do no more true :-my name is Nym, and Falstaff loves your adhere and keep place together, than the hun-wife.-Adieu! I love not the humour of bread dredth Psalm to the tune of Green sleeves. and cheese; and there's the humour of it. Adieu. What tempest, I trow, threw this whale, with so many tuns of oil in his belly, ashore at Windsor ? How shall I be revenged on him? I think the best way were to entertain him with hope, till the wicked fire of lust have melted him in his own grease. Did you ever hear the like? Mrs. Page. Letter for letter; but that the name of Page and Ford differs!-To thy great • Most probably Shakspeare wrote physician. fellow frights humour out of its wits. Fal. You hear all these matters denied, gen-1 flemen; you hear it. Enter Mistress ANNE PAGE with wine; Mis- [Kissing her. Page. Wife, bid these gentlemen welcome :Come we have a hot venison pasty to dinner; come, gentlemen, I hope we shall drink down all unkindness. [Exeunt all but SHALLOW, SLENDER, and EVANS. Slen. I had rather than forty shillings, I had my book of Songs and Sonnets here: Enter SIMPLE. How now, Simple! where have you been? I Slen. Ay, or else I would I might be hanged, la, Re-enter ANNE PAGE. Shal. Here comes fair mistress Anne: Would I were young, for your sake, mistress Anne: Anne. The dinner is on the table; my father desires your worship's company. Shal. I will wait on him, fair mistress Anne. Eva. Od's plessed will; I will not be absence at the grace. [Exeunt SHALLOW and Sir H. EVANS. Anne. Will't please your worship to come in, Sir. Slen. No, I thank you, forsooth, heartily; I am very well. Anne. The dinner attends you, Sir, Slen, I am not a-hungry, I thank you, for sooth Go, sirrah, for all you are my man, go, wait upon my cousin Shallow: [Erit SIMPLE. A justice of peace sometime may be beholden to his friend for a man :-1 keep but three men and a boy yet, till my mother be dead: But what though; yet I live like a poor gentleman born. Anne. I may not go in without your worship: they will not sit till you come. Slen. 'faith, I'll eat nothing; I thank you as much as though I did. I Shal. Come, coz; come, coz; we stay for you. A word with you, coz: marry, this, coz ; There is, as 'twere, a tender, a kind of tender, made afar off by Sir Hugh here;-Do you un-at derstand me? Sten. Ay, Sir, you shall find me reasonable; Eva. Give ear to his motions, master Slender: I will description the matter to you, if you be capacity of it. Sten. Nay, I will do as my cousin Shallow says I pray you, pardon me; he's a justice of peace in his country, simple though I stand here. Eva. But that is not the question; the question is concerning your marriage. Shal. Ay, there's the point, Sir. Eva. Marry, is it; the very point of it; to mistress Anne Page. Sten. Why, if it be so, I will marry her, upon any reasonable demands. Eva. But can you affection the 'oman? Let us command to know that of your mouth, or of your lips; for divers philosophers bold, that the lips is parcel of the mouth;-Therefore, precisely, can you carry your good will to the maid ? Shal. Cousin Abraham Slender, can you love ber? Slen. I hope, Sir,-I will do as it shall become one that would do reason. Eva. Nay, Got's lords and his ladies, you must speak possitable, if you can carry her your desires towards her. Shal. That you must: Will you, upon good dowry, marry her? Sten. I will do a greater thing than that, upon your request, cousin, in any reason. Shal. Nay, conceive me, conceive me, sweet coz; what I do, is to pleasure you, coz: Can you love the maid? Slen. I will marry her, Sir, at your request; but if there be no great love in the beginning, Anne. I pray you, Sir, walk in. Sten. I had rather walk here, I thank you; bruised my shin the other day with playing sword and dagger with a master of fence, three veneys for a dish of stewed prunes; and by my troth, I cannot abide the smell of hot meat since. Why do your dogs bark so I be there bears i' the town? Anne. I think there are, Sir; I heard them talked of. Slen. I love the sport well; but I shall as soon quarrel at it, as any man in England.You are afraid, if you see the bear loose, are you not ? Anne, Aye indeed, Sir. Slen. That's meat and drink to me now: I have seen Sackerson + loose twenty times; and have taken him by the chain but, I warrant you, the women have so cried and shriek'd at it, that it pass'd: -but women, indeed, cannot abide 'em; they are very ill-favoured rough things. Re-enter PAGE. Rage. Come, gentle master Slender, come; we stay for you. Slen. I'll eat nothing; I thank you, Sir. Slen. Nay, pray you, lead the way. Page. Come on, Sir. Sten. Mistress Anne, yourself shall go first. Sten. Truly, I will not go first; truly, la: I will not do you that wrong. Anne. I pray, you, Sir. Slen. P'Il rather be unmannerly than troublesome: you do yourself wroug, indeed, la. SCENE II.-The same. [Exeunt. Enter Sir HUGH EVANS and SIMPLE. yet heaven may decrease it upon better ac-house, which is the way and there dwells one quaintance, when we are married, and have mistress Quickly, which is in the manner of his more occasion to know one another: I hope, dry nurse, or his cook, or his laundry, his washer, upon familiarity will grow more contempt: but if you say, marry her, I will marry her, that I am freely dissolv'd, and dissolutely. and his wringer. Simp. Well, Sir. letter; for it is a 'oman that altogether's acEva. Nay, it is petter yet:--give her this is,quaintance with mistress Anne Page; and the Eva. It is a ferry discretion answer; save, the faul' is in the 'ort dissolutely: the 'ort according to our meaning, resolutely ;-his meaning is good. Shal. Ay, I think my cousin meant well. • An intended blunder. Three set-to's, bouts, or hits. The name of a bear exhibited at Paris-Garden in Southwark. 1 Surpassed all expression. A common adjuration; and a corruption of the sacred Name in the old Moralities. |