I. iv. 100 110 120 130 Lear. I thanke thee fellow, thou feru'ft me, and ile loue thee. Kent. Come fir ile teach you differences, away, away, if Lear. Now friendly knaue I thank thee, their's earnest of Foole. Let me hire him too, heer's my coxcombe. Kent. Why Foole? Foole. Why for taking on's part, that's out of fauour, nay and thou can'st not smile as the wind fits, thou't catch cold shortly, there take my coxcombe; why this fellow hath banifht two on's daughters, and done the third a bleffing against his will, if thou follow him, thou must needs weare my coxcombe, how now nuncle, would I had two coxcombes, and two daughters. Lear. Why my boy? Foole. If I gaue them any liuing, id'e keepe my coxcombs my felfe, ther's mine, beg another of thy daughters. Lear. Take heede firra, the whip. Foole. Truth is a dog that must to kenell, hee must bee whipt out, when Ladie oth'e brach may stand by the fire and ftincke. Lear. A peftilent gull to mee. Foole. Sirra ile teach thee a speech. Lear. Doe. Foole. Marke it vncle, haue more then thou fheweft, fpeake leffe then thou knoweft, lend leffe then thou owest, ride more then thou goeft, learne more then thou troweft, fet leffe then thou throweft, leaue thy drinke and thy whore, and keepe in a 140 doore, and thou fhalt haue more, then two tens to a score. Lear. This is nothing foole. [18 I. iv. 100 110 120 130 140 Lear. I thanke thee fellow. Thou feru'ft me, and Ile loue thee. Kent. Come fir, arise, away, Ile teach you differences: away, away, if you will measure your lubbers length againe, tarry, but away, goe too, haue you wifedome, fo. Lear. Now my friendly knaue I thanke thee, there's earneft of thy feruice. Enter Foole. Foole. Let me hire him too, here's my Coxcombe. Foole. Why? for taking ones part that's out of fauour, Lear. Why my Boy? Fool. If I gaue them all my liuing, I'ld keepe my Coxcombes my felfe, there's mine, beg another of thy Daughters. Lear. Take heed Sirrah, the whip. Foole. Truth's a dog must to kennell, hee must bee whipt out, when the Lady Brach may stand by'th'fire and stinke. Lear. A peftilent gall to me. Foole. Sirha, Ile teach thee a speech. Lear. Do. Foole. Marke it Nuncle; Haue more then thou showest, Speake leffe then thou knoweft, Lend leffe then thou oweft, Ride more then thou goeft, Leaue thy drinke and thy whore, And keepe in a dore, And thou fhalt haue more, Then two tens to a fcore. Kent. This is nothing Foole. I. iv. 150 Foole. Then like the breath of an vnfeed Lawyer, you gaue me nothing for't, can you make no vse of nothing vncle? Lear. Why no boy, nothing can be made out of nothing. Foole. Preethe tell him fo much the rent of his land comes to, he will not beleeue a foole. Lear. A bitter foole. Foole. Doo'ft know the difference my boy, betweene a bitter foole, and a sweete foole. Lear. No lad, teach mee. Foole. That Lord that counfail'd thee to giue away thy land, Lear. Do'st thou call mee foole boy? Foole. All thy other Titles thou haft giuen away, tha thou waft borne with. Kent. This is not altogether foole my Lord. Foole. No faith, Lords and great men will not let me, if I had a monopolie out, they would haue part an't, and Ladies too, they will not let me haue all the foole to my felfe, they'l be fnatching; 170 giue me an egge Nuncle, and ile giue thee two crownes. Lear. What two crownes fhall they be? Foole. Why, after I haue cut the egge in the middle and eate vp the meate, the two crownes of the egge; when thou cloueft thy crowne it'h middle, and gaueft away both parts, thou boreft thy affe at'h backe or'e the durt, thou had'ft little wit in thy bald crowne, when thou gaueft thy golden one away, if I fpeake like 180 my felfe in this, let him be whipt that firft finds it fo. 190 Fooles had nere leffe wit in a yeare, For wife men are growne foppish, They know not how their wits doe weare, Their manners are so apish. Lear. When were you wont to be fo full of fongs firra? Foole. I haue vs'd it nuncle, euer fince thou mad'st thy daughters thy mother, for when thou gaueft them the rod, and put'st downe thine own breeches, then they for fudden ioy did weep, and I for forrow fung, that fuch a King should play bo-peepe, and goe the fooles among: prethe Nunckle keepe a schoolemafter that can teach thy foole to lye, I would faine learne to lye. [19 I. iv. 150 Foole. Then 'tis like the breath of an vnfeed Lawyer, you gaue me nothing for't, can you make no vse of nothing Nuncle? Lear. Why no Boy, Nothing can be made out of nothing. Foole. Prythee tell him, fo much the rent of his land' comes to, he will not beleeue a Foole. Lear. A bitter Foole. Foole. Do'st thou know the difference my Boy, betweene a bitter Foole, and a fweet one. Lear. No Lad, teach me. 170 Foole. Nunckle, giue me an egge, and Ile giue thee two Crownes. Lear. What two Crownes shall they be? Foole. Why after I haue cut the egge i'th'middle and eate vp the meate, the two Crownes of the egge: when thou cloueft thy Crownes i'th'middle, and gau'ft away both parts, thou boar'ft thine Affe on thy backe o're the durt, thou had'ft little wit in thy bald crowne, when thou gau'ft thy golden one away; if I fpeake like my selfe in 180 this, let him be whipt that firft findes it fo. Fooles had nere leffe grace in a yeere, For wifemen are growne foppish, And know not how their wits to weare, . Le. When were you wont to be fo full of Songs firrah? Foole. I haue vfed it Nunckle, ere fince thou mad'ft thy Daughters thy Mothers, for when thou gau'ft them 190 the rod, and put'ft downe thine owne breeches, then they For fodaine ioy did weepe, And I for forrow fung, That fuch a King should play bo-peepe, [288b I. iv. 200 210 220 230 Lear. And you lye, weele haue you whipt. Foole. I maruell what kin thou and thy daughters are, they'l haue me whipt for speaking true, thou wilt haue mee whipt for lying, and fometime I am whipt for holding my peace, I had rather be any kind of thing then a foole, and yet I would not bee thee Nuncle, thou haft pared thy wit a both fides, & left nothing in the middle, here comes one of the parings. Enter Gonorill. Lear. How now daughter, what makes that Frontlet on, Foole. Thou waft a prettie fellow when thou had'ft no need Mum, mum, he that keepes neither cruft nor crum, Wearie of all, fhall want fome. That's a fheald pefcod. Gon. Not onely fir this, your all-licene'd foole, but other of your infolent retinue do hourely carpe and quarrell, breaking forth in ranke & (not to be indured riots,) Sir I had thought by making this well knowne vnto you, to haue found a fafe redres, but now grow fearefull by what your felfe too late haue spoke and done, that you protect this courfe, and put on by your allowance, which if you should, the fault would not fcape cenfure, nor the redreffe, fleepe, which in the tender of a wholsome weale, might in their working doe you that offence, that else were shame, that then neceffitie must call difcreet proceedings. [20 240 Foole. For you trow nuncle, the hedge fparrow fed the Cookow fo long, that it had it head bit off beit young, fo out went the candle, and we were left darkling. Lear. Are you our daughter? Gon. Come fir, I would you would make vse of that good wifedome whereof I know you are fraught, and put away these |