XXV. A transport of gratitude for saving mercy: I BLESS a thousand times the happy day when first a beam of heavenly light broke in on my soul; when the Day-star from on high visited me, and the celestial light began to dawn. I welcomed its cheerful lustre, and felt the sacred influence. The flames of holy love awoke, and holy joys were kindled. The earth, and all its pageantry disappeared, like clouds before the morning sun. The scenes of paradise were opened-seraphic pleasures and unutterable delights. All hail, I cried, you unknown joys, you unexperienced pleasures! compared to you, what is all I have relished till now? what is earthly beauty and harmony! what is all that mortals call charming and attractive! I never lived till now. I knew no more than the name of happiness till now. I have been in a dream during all the days of my folly and vanity; but now I awake to the life of heaven-born spirits, and taste the joys of angels. XXVI. Importunate requests for the return of God to the soul. THOU great and glorious, thou invisible and universal Being, art thou no nearer to be approached? or do I search thee amiss! Is there a corner of the creation unvisited by thee, or any place exempt from thy presence? I trace thy footsteps through heaven and earth, but I cannot overtake thee. Why do I seck thee, if thou art not here? Tell me, O my God and my all, tell me where thou art to be found; for there is the place of my rest. What imaginable good can supply thy absence? Deprived of thee, all that the world could offer would be like a jest to a dying man, and provoke my aversion and disdain. It is a God that I seek: My wishes stoop not to a lower aim; Thou, thou hast kindled this immortal flame, Which nothing can allay. Adieu, adieu to all human things! Let me find my God, the end of all my wishes Why dost thou keep back the face of thy throne? Why does the cloud and sacred darkness conceal thee? Thy voice produc'd the seas and spheres, Through all these various works of thine. O thou fairer than all the works of thy hands, wilt thou ever hide thyself from a creature that loves and feels thee with so intense desire? I ap peal to thee, O Lord, are not my breathings after thee most hearty and unfeigned? Does not my soul pant after thee with a fervour which cannot be extinguished, and a sincerity which cannot be disguised? For thee I pine, and am for thee undone ; As drooping flow'rs that want their parent sun. How do my spirits languish for thee? No similitudes can express the vehemence of my desires. Wealth and glory, friends and pleasure, lose their names, compared to thee. To follow thee, I would leave them all behind; I would leave the whole creation, and bid the fields and sparkling skies adieu. Let the heavens and earth be no more; while thou endurest for ever, I can want no support. My being itself, with all its blessedness, depends entirely on thee. Place me far from the bounds of all creation, remote from all existence but thy own. In that ineffable solitude let me be lost; let me expatiate there for ever, let me run the endless rounds of bliss.But, alas! I flatter myself in vain with scenes of unattainable happiness. I will search thee then, where I hope thou mayst be found. I cast my eyes to the bright regions above, and almost envy the happy beings that see thy face unveiled. I search thee in the flowery meadows, and listen for thee among the murmuring springs, Then silent and abstracted from human things, I search thee in the holy contemplation: it is all in vain; nor fields, nor floods, nor clouds, nor stars reveal thee. through heaven and earth, but I cannot overtake Why do I seek thee, if thou art not here? Tell me, O my God and my all, tell me where thou art to be found; for there is the place of my What imaginable good can supply thy absence? Deprived of thee, all that the world could offer would be like a jest to a dying man, and provoke my aversion and disdain. It is a God that I seek: My wishes stoop not to a lower aim; Thou, thou hast kindled this immortal flame, Adieu, adieu to all human things! Let me find my God, the end of all my wishes keep back the face of thy throne? Why dost thou Why does the cloud and sacred darkness conceal thee? Thy voice produc'd the seas and spheres, Through all these various works of thine. O thou fairer than all the works of thy hands, wilt thou ever hide thyself from a creature that loves and feels thee with so intense desire? I appeal to thee, O Lord, are not my breathings after thee most hearty and unfeigned? Does not my soul pant after thee with a fervour which cannot be extinguished, and a sincerity which cannot be disguised? For thee I pine, and am for thee undone ; As drooping flow'rs that want their parent sun. How do my spirits languish for thee? No similitudes can express the vehemence of my desires. Wealth and glory, friends and pleasure, lose their names, compared to thee. To follow thee, I would leave them all behind; I would leave the whole creation, and bid the fields and sparkling skies adieu. Let the heavens and earth be no more; while thou endurest for ever, I can want no support. My being itself, with all its blessedness, depends entirely on thee. Place me far from the bounds of all creation, remote from all existence but thy own. In that ineffable solitude let me be lost; let me expatiate there for ever, let me run the endless rounds of bliss.But, alas! I flatter myself in vain with scenes of unattainable happiness. I will search thee then, where I hope thou mayst be found. I cast my eyes to the bright regions above, and almost envy the happy beings that see thy face unveiled. I search thee in the flowery meadows, and listen for thee among the murmuring springs, Then silent and abstracted from human things, I search thee in the holy contemplation: it is all in vain; nor fields, nor floods, nor clouds, nor stars reveal thee. |